Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Education in Democracy


 
For some reason, I was fascinated by the particular choice to spell the word politik with the letter 'k' in All the King's Men. While reading the book in high school, I remember reading it out loud to myself with a strong 'k!' sound as if it made all the difference in the world between the meaningless politics of today's election and the pressing issues of the Zeitgeist and its relation to the necessity to focus on realpolitik -expanding upon policies of practical matters rather than "moral" or ideological factors .

I watched the Republican National Convention last week and just finished watching the first day of the Democratic National Convention. I was impressed by so many articulate speakers from both parties, but one speech in particular made me cry - Michelle Obama's. When she began to speak of her father's journey and everyday endeavor to provide for her and her brother, I couldn't help but make that comparison with my own father and his constant wish to provide for my sister and me.

All my life, my dad stressed the importance of education - not school, not academics, but education. "Education", he always reminds me, "comes from many different sources - from the people we meet, from the books we read, and the realization of every day consequences educate us." He believed in the opportunity that education provided more than the physical diploma itself. Even during the years I began to become interested in elections and politics, he stressed not to just listen to the media but become the voice others can listen to and learn from your own effort through research and self-initiative to find information to form my own opinion. Being educated is an incredible blessing. I'm always aware of it. Education allows us to open our minds to accept situations foreign to us, but most importantly, it allows us to step bravely into opportunities presented before us.

My parents worked hard all their lives. We didn't have it easy. My dad's biggest fear was that because our middle-class background my sister and I would stop ourselves from even trying to go for dreams we thought were out of reach. When I told my dad I wanted to go to Columbia University, he simply asked, "What's stopping you?" He told me not to worry about money or anything else - if I have a dream, go for it. So I sent my one and only college application and heard back with good news. My dad took immediate action, found more employment opportunities, and sacrificed so much to make sure he can pay that tuition bill right on time and I would never miss a registration date. "You see for my dad, that's what it meant to be a man." [Obama] My dad's belief that his fatherly duty is to provide will never be satisfied. He will always feel like he has to do more and this is why I know I am incredibly blessed and feel even more compelled to push harder so that one day I, too, can take on a motherly role and do the same.

After finishing my Masters degree, I decided to take a break and read TIME magazine and follow the current election. I realized shortly after beginning to read a Joe Klein article, that I did not have an opinion on this year's election. I did not have an opinion, because I was not educated enough to form an opinion. You see, in order to have an opinion, you must know a small but decent amount on the subject to be able to form an opinion of your own. Without knowing, you are simply regurgitating. Perhaps that's why in so many countries educational development is discouraged since it keeps people from forming their own opinion. I read the same article three times before increasingly becoming frustrated that for the past three years, I had only cared about Architecture (my major). I was in school, engrossed in academia, and forgot to educate myself. It reminded me of the story of my dad building a catapult.  My father's generation experienced the trial and error of Westernized elections in a country that newly adopted democracy. Him and his friends printed pamphlets about the meaning of democracy and the power of voting and using that self-constructed catapult, climbed hills of nearby universities to launch the literature into campuses. He was trying to provide insight that couldn't be found in textbooks printed by pre-democratic officials in Korea. He hoped that through his efforts he could help create an environment for his children that was more tolerant and free. During the past three years, I had forgotten to take my nose out of academia and embrace the knowledge in the fast-paced world around me.

Perhaps Obama did make a political mistake by stating that our success wasn't achieved alone, but I can't help but agree that my own success wasn't done solely through self-propelled actions. I am able to do the things I can today because of my parents who believed in the power of education, because of teachers that inspired this tiny brain of mine, and because of the fact that by some God-given luck I was able to be raised in this free, beautiful country. Without my parents, without teachers who give their all to make every class an inspirational one, and without the opportunity to live in this developed democratic country, I can't say I would have ended up in the same place.

I am not telling anyone to vote one way or another. I don't believe in "politics"; I strongly encourage the belief in the hope that when people stand up for what is thought to be right for the good of the whole, lasting changes can affect a nation and these often come through the form of policy changes and financial regulations.  I consider myself as a person who prefers to vote looking at several issues, parties,  and considering long-term effects. But if you are a person that strongly feels for one particular issue and are okay with just one issue being resolved then all the power to-ya. I am simply encouraging everyone to recognize the immense gift of free education and to use that knowledge to actively stand up for your belief.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

the wheel


I wrote my college entrance essay about John McCain, Brittany Murphy, and myself. I sent it all to 1 college - all or nothing. Just like that, I ended up in New York City (the city I can't seem to leave for reasons I can't explain). Everyone has their iconic actress, or singer, or hero that for some darn reason, they can sympathize with.

I've never met Ms. Murphy and I never will, but watching her through movies and hearing her soft-high, squeaky voice in songs was to me always an oddly life changing experience. You can say that it was the writers, or the director that wrote the words in her movies, or guided her acting but it was so much more than just acting. She was honest, raw, and so completely present. I watched most of her movies and though there are many favorites that somehow mirror my emotions - Love & Other Disasters, Ramen Girl, and Uptown Girls - there is 1 movie in particular that I find most sympathetic. 

When I first began watching The Little Black Book, it was a long perhaps not the most interesting movie. But, I wasn't really watching the movie. I was listening to Ms. Murphy. I found myself laughing along side her ridiculously charming laughter, because she was speaking to me. At the very end of the movie, she says to me,
    "By fall, I was ready to try again. A little bruised, a little humbled, and hopefully a little smarter. I believe we write our own stories. And, each time we think we know the end, we don't. Perhaps luck exists somewhere between the world of planning and the world of chance and in the peace that comes from knowing, that you just can't know it all. Life's funny that way. Once you let go of the wheel, you might end up right where you belong." ... and just like that. She went away again. I was left back to my reality sitting at the table, watching my laptop, wondering how long I've held on to my wheel. 

Ms. Murphy passed away when I had graduated college and had just finished the most difficult semester of my life in graduate school. I was crying in bed thinking about fate, chance, and how much effort played into luck. I thought, "How does a girl that jumps into a rabbit hole, plummeting into chaos, come out unchanged? The answer, she doesn't." 

Currently, I don't know where life is taking me and what God has planned for me. But, I can't just sit here and do nothing, because only nothing comes out of nothing. But, I can't keep planning life either. Since John Lennon said, "Life happens when you're busy making other plans." Then he got shot... so we just have to live, stop planning our moves, and stop letting things happen. It's been 8 months since my last post and since then I've come out a little bruised, a little humbled, and hopefully a little smarter.  I believe in happy endings, too. I just have to find mine. 

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Glorified NY




Yesterday, I stood on the New York City subway platform holding a coffee in one hand, a tube of drawings in the other, and dressed head-to-toe in greyscale. Running late to a meeting, I began to make what every women stays up at night making in bed... "THE LIST" (thank you for that, How Does She Do It?).

Drawings? Check.
Caffeine? Check.
Phone? Check.
Cue cards? Check.
Heels? Check!
hmmm... that beam above me doesn't seem that structurally sound. Ah, oh well. What does an architect know about structure anyways? Whatever, check.
I'm living my NY dream, have an amazing family, loved ones around me, it's a beautiful day, I'm not sick (for once). But, something is still missing...

Sleep? Ah yes, definitely missing, but who needs sleep on 2 consecutive days. So no, that's not it.
OH YEA, money. I've got none.


My head has been juggling job opportunities left and right. Debating potential projects up and down. In a city that has everything, it fails to mention that it's glorified when you have it all, but so dirty when you don't.

[I see a bunny between the rails - I REFUSE to call rats, "rats". For now, they shall remain as "bunnies"]

You and I don't have it much differently, bunny. I have to share my house with others, walk the dirty streets, and also commute via 1 line - bud. Am I a bunny? No... just a poor architect.


I'm ready to move on. I'm ready for change involving a different city. Who knows where I'll be in 6 months. Knowing New York and its incredible abilities to be a black hole, I might still be here. The few moments of sunshine hitting the old buildings, the impeccably straight angles of the rooflines against the blue sky, endless lists of fun things to do, and living walking distance to the center of the universe (that or a Starbucks). Yep, I've been trapped into its glorified grasp over and over, again. But, I being serious now. I am determined to move on. Ask me where I am in 6 months from now.